'56 Packard Man

Hat tip to “Joe P” for today’s theme!

Top Ten Country and Western Songs of All Time:

10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine.
9. I Ain’t Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman But I Woke Up With a Few.
8. If The Phone Don’t Ring, You’ll Know It’s Me.
7. I’ve Missed You, But My Aim’s Improvin’.
6. Wouldn’t Take Her To A Dogfight ‘Cause I’m Scared She’d Win.
5. I’m So Miserable Without You It’s Like You’re Still Here.
4. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Miss Him.
3. She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger.
2. She’s Lookin’ Better with Every Beer.

And the Number One Country & Western song is:

1. It’s Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My @$$ All Day.

-00OO00-

All that Country and Western somehow brought Elvis to mind –
even though they aren’t the same at all …

…which brings us to …
• Bacon Awareness
(Hat tip: Steven Hayward)

• A Prayer for Grandpa
(Hat tip: “A. Nonymous”)

Dear God,Please send clothes
for all those poor ladies on
grandpa’s computer.
Amen

• I Had It All!
(Tips of the hat to “Joe P” and “Dr. Mc”.”)

I talked to a to a homeless man this morning and asked him how he
ended up this way.

He said, “Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat,
my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had
TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. I
was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had
full medical coverage.”

I felt sorry for him, so I asked, “What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?”

“Oh no, nothing like that,” he said. “No, no…. I was paroled.”

• Snark du Jour

• Pun du Jour

• Why Women Live Longer Than Men

• Ode to Miss Piggy
(This is just for you, Parsnip!” … )

• More News You Can Use:

• From The Annals of Proper Product Placement:
(We can thank Prof. Steven Hayward for this … )

… which brings us to the Peanut BUTTer aisle at Walmart:

… And now, in closing …