Hat tips to “Joe P.” and “Dr. Mc” for today’s lead item.
The value of a Catholic Education and a #2 Pencil
Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School. Usually she slept through the class.
One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping.
“Tell me Susie, who created the universe?”
When Susie didn’t stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took his sharp #2 pencil and jabbed her in the rear.
“God Almighty!” shouted Susie.
The Nun said,”Very good” and continued teaching her class.
A little later the Nun asked Susie, “Who is our Lord and Savior?”
But Susie didn’t stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to her rescue and stuck her in the butt.
“Jesus Christ!!!” shouted Susie.
And the Nun once again said, “Very good,” and Susie fell back asleep.
The Nun asked her a third question…”What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?”
Again, Johnny came to the rescue.
This time Susie jumped up and shouted, “If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I’ll break it in half!”
The nun fainted!!!
• The Friday Funnies Food and Nutrition Corner
… which brings us to …
• How Was Your Monday?
… was it this guy that did it?
• That Look You Make
• Snark du Jour
• Awkward Moments
• This Should Happen More Often:
This Week’s Walmartian!
The Walmart Car Show
• Lawyer Joke du Jour
(Hat tip to “Dr. Mc” for this series. His father was lead counsel for the law firm of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe.)
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
• Separated at Birth
• Wedded Bliss
(Hat tip: “B-Squared”)
My wife was not in good humor so I suggested a nice drive in the country to cheer her up. She was really grouchy and not speaking much to me. When we passed a pig farm she said, “Relatives of yours?” I said, “Yes, in-laws.” That’s when the fight started.
And now, in closing: