'56 Packard Man

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• YJCMTSU – Crime Doesn’t Pay Edition

• An Arresting Headline:

… next up in the annals of crime …

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• Blonde Joke du Jour

Ms. Anne O’Dyne – The Friday Funnies Staff Blonde

… It’s in the rules:  the Blonde Joke du Jour MUST be followed by the …

• Lawyer Joke du Jour – Today, it’s the Question & Answer Edition

Q: How do you kill 4000 lawyers?
A: You build a new Titanic and declare it cannot sink.

Q: What’s the strongest argument against both theories of the origin of man?
A: Politicians and lawyers. Who in their right mind would create (or evolve into) these species?

Q: If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

Q: How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?
A: Never enough.

Q: Have you heard about the lawyers word processor?
A: No matter what font you select, everything comes out in fine print.

Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can’t understand.

Q: What do you buy a friend graduating from Law School?
A: A lobotomy.

Q: What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?
A: One’s a bottom-crawling scum sucker and the other’s just a fish.

Q: What is the difference between a female lawyer and a catfish?
A: One’s slimey and has whiskers, and the other one lives in the water.

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• At “Dr. Mc’s” Clinic

(“Dr. Mc” is the Friday Funnies Staff Neurologist and Resident Irishman.”)

• Good Advice:

• The Friday Funnies Food & Nutrition Corner

Managing Your Diabetes:

• California Real Estate:

• Bear With Me Now:

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• Wedded Bliss

… next up:

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• Was the waitress blonde?

… next up:

… now we come to this week’s example of …

• WWLLTM

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• More News You Can Use:

• How Was Your Monday?

• John Williams, Conductor vs. SemiConductor

• This Won’t End Well:

… on that note, we close this Friday with: